some thoughts on belief

Recently, there have been lots of opportunities in my life for unbelief, doubt, and despair. While I don't *like* these feelings, it's often easier to live in those feelings than in feelings of belief and joy etc. Easier because it's more the tendency of human nature, not easier because it feels better; it doesn't. 

With all these opportunities arising, I've been trying to figure out how to deal with the negative pressure that builds with negative thinking. I've got a lot of important deadlines coming up, I'm trying to keep my relationships in order, and it gets difficult sometimes. "What if this happens? What if some problem comes up you didn't plan on? What if you mess something up?" Questions like this keep playing in my head, and sometimes I just want to scream for it all to stop. To let me have a few minutes of silence and peace, a moment to collect my thoughts. 

All my life, I've heard people teach about standards and the best ways to ensure you keep them. "Decide now, know what your decision will be. That way, if the choice ever arises, you've already decided." So I've been thinking, why can't that same philosophy carry over into this? Can you simply decide to choose belief, not fear? Why not? I think that it's a very viable idea. I've been trying it, and it's an extremely empowering feeling. I feel like I'm winning more battles in my head, but also in my life. I feel more like the person I was made to be.  Kinda cool. 

Whenever the decision comes to give into fear, or rise above with faith, I choose to believe. 

I believe, and that sets me free.